Sunday, December 26, 2010

Such a wanna-be!

Over the past couple of years, as I've come to embrace my inner Jesus Freak, outside of church and a few carefully cultivated friends, I'm finding myself more and more estranged. Estranged from whom? People who do not know or have chosen a path apart from Christ. I'm quite perplexed by this. I've spent a great deal of time praying, contemplating, and pondering the differences between me and the people from whom I've become estranged.

It's a self imposed exile. There are lot of fellow Jesus Freak friends and family here in this new life. Since I do still love people from the old neighborhood, there are times I miss them. I wish they could know what I know and understand who I now am and why I have changed.

Why turn to the internet as a wanna-be blogger? An outlet to explain myself, I suppose. What followers will join me on this journey? Not expecting any really. Still, I have a lot of opinions to share. Maybe somebody will find my solution to the U.S. economic crisis useful. Right after listening to God, people are really missing out on the advice that I could be distributing. (God doesn’t normally strike people down with lightening anymore, does He?)

Blogging worked as a way for an acquaintance of mine, Lisa Pietch, to become and author. Another author, Jen Lancaster turned her blog and unemployment experience into a successful career as an author – between temp jobs. In college, the teachers kept saying the only way to hone writing skills was to actually…write… a lot. Although I like to write, and there was a time where I was almost good at it, it’s always been a little…restrained…since my mother found and read a journal of mine when I was a teenager. Not a pleasant memory!

In the past year especially, I made a decision that I cannot hide who I am. I cannot temper my love of Jesus or what I understand the literal word of the Bible to mean because others might be offended, not believe in whom I believe, or not believe in Him the way I believe.

I really believe that my decision not to hide my inner Freak under a rock played a large part in being fired from a job I truly loved last April (the day before my birthday, too). It’s been an interesting ride with my husband, who does not “believe the way I believe.” While it’s acceptable to take the kids off to the church for religious studies, most of my family thinks it’s best to keep it to ourselves as abstract lessons of generally good and moral behavior. Actually really living out what’s taught there is far too controversial and polarizing for nearly all of my related kin – but that’s a topic for another day.

This won’t be a well advertised blog; it’s not for everybody. If you stumbled upon this, and want to join me on this bit of my life’s journey, welcome. Let’s see where God takes us on this blog adventure!

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